We tell ourselves that intimacy (and marriage) takes two people who are willing to work at it-but, unfortunately, we rarely have the slightest inkling of our "job" assignments in this project.

David Schnarch
About This Quote

When we feel that there is something lacking in our relationship, we tend to blame ourselves, thinking that if only we were different, better, more attentive, more loving, better looking, or smarter than the other person then our relationship would be perfect. Actually, there are two very different ways of viewing marriage. One view is that of the couple's relationship with God. The other view is their relationship with each other. God has much more to do with marriage than most people realize.

When a couple becomes deeply committed to God and gives themselves over completely to Him, it is easier for them to be committed to each other as well. Marriage is hard work. It takes persistence and patience to maintain a decent relationship. It takes caring for each other even when you are feeling hurt or angry or frustrated or bitter or discouraged or insecure or lonely.

It takes being willing to listen to each other even when your feelings are hurt. It takes not blaming each other for your little problems instead blaming yourself. And it takes perseverance in making things work even when you are doing it wrong!

Source: Passionate Marriage: Keeping Love And Intimacy Alive In Committed Relationships

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